The Practice of Solitude. Starvation.

Never have i been so thirsty...

... So hungry, so close and so distant to the sweet taste of the desired.

It's so fascinating! I am truly fascinated by it! It is a beast! Desire is a force unlike any other. She lusts. It's as if the full moon lives inside me. Locked up with all her power. Fascinating! This hunger to move, be moved ... it's at the tip of the tongue. Tethered to nothing but it's own thirst ... loose, wild, seeking. Sensual.

The wise ones say Soul, the Mothership, is not within but rather, enfolding, embracing and pervading being. Only a fraction of Soul fits inside the body. The rest, is everywhere, the rest, is what we seek. Desire is the antagonist of  Soul, they say desire keeps us from connecting to Soul. Desire, which is within, pushing, shoving, begging to be released. Begging to be fed. Fascinating. I am in awe and bewilderedness of this blind force longing to See, to be touched, living just underneath my skin. Perhaps, Soul and Desire are one within the other. The release of One, grants the other freedom.

She is in my breath. Tender and fierce at the same time. A new phase is coming. The beast inside, is hungry, thirsty. She won't rest. Something is awakening in the midst of the disassembling of the known. 

Little deaths, in the process of a new brith? Perhaps. There are so many ways to starve. I never knew this one. 

Love// Alex

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