When truth has been reclaimed
What happens next?
Will life take a new turn? What will it look like? What would i want it to look like?
I've been thinking about this, since i'm so close now to reclaiming my story, more officially. What next? A book? A new blog post (probably)? Silence? Nothing? Somehow, that would be the worst, nothing. That nothing at all changed.
All my life, i've felt as if i were wrong and displaced. Not like i've been lost, just not, found. Not suffering because of it, at least not knowingly, just used to being otherly. It even became a sweet accessory at some point, the weirdness i carr(y)-ied around. (You might find previous Dharma Stories on identity interesting).
I'm anticipating a new sort of emotion. A completely new experience. I think, one that i have never felt before. It feels exciting. I don't quite know what to expect. I have glimpses of a future sometimes, but i don't know. Maybe the Universe is waiting for a queue and then i'll be posted on the details.
This is where the practice of patience and trust come into play. Not knowing, is not a bad thing, it is, not knowing. One does what needs to be done, and the rest is up to the Force. As a friend told me, sometimes one simply has to throw all the cards in the air and see where they land. I'm not much of a card player, but i'm ready to throw the shit in the air, and get out of the way.
I plan on a new open horizon. Where the breathing has a slightly fresher freshness to it.